Thursday, June 26, 2014

So there is this little meme going around,  maybe you've seen it? 

No not that, but yum!.......


No wrong one..... 

Okay now that's funny but still wrong....

Ah ha!  *faints*
Sorry,  I know that's a quite predictable response.   And apparently it has been pretty common...... At least by women.    Men however have responded with an disproportionate amount of "how dare you!" to said women.   Now THAT is something I wasn't expecting!

Though maybe I should have.   When I mentioned it to my husband he responded with a hearty laugh and said something to the effect that "men are mad because  he has a better chance at getting laid than they do".    Most of the time I just nod and smile when he talks, but I wondered if for once he might have a point.  
So I started paying attention to the responses.   At first I wasn't sure if he was right or just over analyzing.  

Well I'll be Bell Hooks!   I think he was right!   For the most part,  the angry responses are two parts patriarchy and one part objectification to the Nth power.    Or maybe it's the other way around...... I'm not good with recipes.  Or math.

The message behind these messages is that
1) women aren't entitled to their own sexuality when it isn't for the purpose of pleasing men.   Oh sure,  you can flirt with other chicks cuz that's a turn on for many straight men. So from the standpoint of these men,  that's really their sexuality being acted out by women.   But making a big deal of some guy who probably looks twenty times better than average guys and a hundred times better than the slovenly ones...... Well what fun is that?!
2) if you like some guy who looks hotter than most,  you clearly aren't thinking right. Silly girl!  If the  average guy likes some chick who has been airbrushed to the point of having alien measurements,  it's because she's hot.  But you silly women clearly don't make any sense.
Double standard for the win!
3) to me this is the most dangerous. The one my husband pointed out.   The one that I initially missed.   This is the line of thought that is the gateway to rape culture-- women owe men sex if they do things *right*. therefore the sudden realization that there is a possibility that women would prefer someone who is literally in a mug shot,  currently incarcerated,  and has a rap sheet......   Means that guys who play by the rules have been cheated out of sex that is *owed* to them.   How dare women even ponder giving sex (cuz it's a thing and not a mutual act ya know) that is owed to good men to some asshole.   Que the anger!!  
The insistence that women are engaging in objectification of this singular photo is really just objectification.   Like crazy angry objectification.